


Scars and Magic

by Yuna_Starlines



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: A character hurts himself on purpose, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Kinda self-harming but not really, Lots of Original Characters - Freeform, M/M, Scars, also unreliable writer because my emotional stability jumped out the window since quarantine, off screen racism
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-22
Updated: 2020-07-07
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:34:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,958
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24853156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yuna_Starlines/pseuds/Yuna_Starlines
Summary: “When you get a scar or even a small bruise, it will appear on your skin, and the other way around, like a small tattoo.”Patton thought his soulmate was adventurous, in the end he was wrong, oh so very wrong.
Relationships: Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Deceit | Janus Sanders, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders & Deceit | Janus Sanders, Deceit | Janus Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Comments: 14
Kudos: 66





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I been wanting to write this fic for almost five days, but I just couldn’t do it, today I finally did. I tried my best, but keep in mind I’m not in the best place right now, emotionally at least.
> 
> I did like the idea, but I don’t like the execution of this one.
> 
> Anyways, it’s a two shot and the other part is almost done, I hope y'all like it <3

Patton was four when he was drawing in the walls with some paint that mommy bought when he felt something funny on his arm. For a moment, he thought that maybe it was the paint, so he ignored it. Once he finished his masterpiece, he went to get his mommy when he noticed the yellow flower near his elbow. It was a simple drawing, a flower made by circles.

He ran to his mama, hoping to get an answer.

She smiled, and gently scooped him into her lap and explain that it was his soulmate. “When you get a scar or even a small bruise, it will appear on your skin, and the other way around, like a small tattoo.” She said, showing her arm and a beautiful flower was there.

“Tattoo?” He asked, touching with his chubby fingers the flower on his mama arm, that had more petals and was more pretty.

“Yes, sweetheart, like this little drawing.”

Patton nodded and continue on his day, marveling at the little yellow flower on his elbow. Later, much later, his mommy would scold him because of the drawing on the wall, but he was too excited about his soulmate to remember how the scolding went.

* * *

Patton was ten, when he got the idea to carve into his skin to talk with his soulmate.

Patton, at this young age had most of his body covered in tattoos. 

The one on his elbow never disappeared, he had one on his right palm, various over his legs and one on his abdomen and the littles tattoos that would disappeared over the days because they were bruises. As he grew up, the tattoos became more and more detailed. He started painting each petal, hoping his soulmate would feel it.

However, he couldn’t help but think that his soulmate was so adventurous that he had his body covered on beautiful tattoos, while Patton only had two scars of his own. One on his knee when he fell from a tree and one on his ribcage, so he decided to made his own scar to talk to him.

He waited until his mothers were asleep and picked up a knife.

He tried to write the letter P, to talk to him. 

He really wanted to talk to his soulmate, he only got to half the letter, a horizontal line and half the curve to make the p when his mama entered the kitchen and saw him.

“I can explain!” He said, but really, he couldn’t. Patton wanted to talk to his soulmate, and that was it.

His mama didn’t say anything, just helped him clean his thigh while mumbling _stupide garçon_ [Silly boy]. Then, next day, he had to explain what he was doing with the knife and the reason why he had his thighs bandaged.

His moms were serious, but not mad, or at least he didn’t get the mad aura.

“Promise us you won’t do that again, Pat. Something bad could happen.”

“I just wanna know how soulmate is…”

“I know, sweetie, but the world will let you know eventually.”

Patton didn’t say anything, until he felt his mama and mom sitting in front of him, both with tears on their eyes, “Please?”

“Okay.”

He stopped with the idea of scarring himself, but he continued painting each petal on his skin.

His soulmate had a chivalrous and adventurous nature, and he already loved it.

* * *

Patton was fourteen when he realized his soulmate wasn’t adventurous.

Someone was hurting him. 

There was no way this tattoo was an accident. Someone, on purpose made this.

Half of his face was now covered with flowers, tiny yellow flowers from his forehead until his cheekbone, his ear, his eyelid. While he adored the aesthetic of it, he couldn’t help but worry about them.

“They are in danger” He said, to his mama, who was cooking breakfast.

He didn’t eat.

He spent all morning crying.

* * *

Janus was five when a small flower appeared on his knee. He covered it with jeans, hoping that the family who was fostering him didn’t noticed.

This family wasn’t that bad. There were other kids living with him, and he shared the room with only two, since they were the youngest.

He didn’t really know what the flower on his knee meant, but it was cute. At night, he trailed the petals with his fingers, and closed his eyes.

Maybe it was magic.

Janus didn’t believed in magic, he stopped long ago after he ended on foster care, but seeing the small flower on his knee, made him wondered.

He was eight when another flower appeared on his ribcage. It was a bad day, he didn’t remembered anymore about it, he just remembered that one of the people smacked his face, and he was crying. When he showered he noticed the small blue flower on his ribcage, and he smiled.

He didn’t believed in magic, but those flowers made him hope.

If magic existed, then he could survive the hell he was living in.

Janus was eleven, when the flowers got half of his thigh. A horizontal line with half a curve line on the top. He couldn’t help but panic, because this time, the flowers were noticeable, and he knew that being a freak in the foster system meant not being able to find a family.

He was panicking, because he was scared. He was relatively new to the house he was in, and was the only children Mrs. Perez was fostering, what if she was one of the bad ones?

He was trying hard not to cry, when Mrs. Perez found him. She was probably here only to say goodnight, but still, she startled him.

“What’s the matter, _cariño_ [sweetie]?” She asked, with her thick accent.

Janus didn’t say anything, just stared at her, “I think I’m cursed.” He answered, without thinking, mentally cursing himself.

She got closer, and sat on the bed, next to him. “Why?”

He didn’t say anything, but she saw the small flowers on his thigh. “Oh-” she laughed, very softly, “That’s not _brujeria_ [witchcraft], my love, that’s your soulmate.”

And she explained, how soulbounds and soulmates worked. She even showed him some tattoos on her wrists. Janus wanted to asked more, but didn’t he scare that maybe, Mrs. Perez was a bad person.

In the end, Mrs. Perez was the nicest person he had ever lived with.

She explained him, not only about soulmates, but about life too. She really cared about him, and Janus had bitten his tongue once or twice to stopped himself from calling her mom.

She wanted to adopt him, and she apply for it.

The system didn’t play on their favor, since she was an immigrant and old, at least for the system standards.

Janus spent four years in that house, and it was probably the happiest years on his life.

* * *

Janus couldn’t remember the reason why he got out of Mrs. Perez house. It was a normal fight, and they normally did fight, but this one got louder and louder, and so he locked himself into his room.

He knew it was probably a bad idea, but he was really mad, so he called his social worker to get out of that place. He regretted it the moment he saw the face of his almost-mom. A part of him hoped that she fought the social worker, but he knew she couldn’t.

Still, she crossed him and gave him a kiss on the top of his head, “Te amo, mi niño [I love you my child].” She said in her language. Janus was already fluent in Spanish, but he couldn’t bring himself to say it back.

The house they took him to, was a bad one.

He recognized the signs of the other kids who were there. They were smiling, but a nervous smile.

He almost wanted to call his almost-mom.

He did text her, a small _miss you already… perdón._

She answered the next day, with a _I still love you, don’t worry._

* * *

There was a fight in the house.

There was a fight and Janus was hiding in his room, like the kid he denied he was.

It had been almost four years since he heard the sound of an adult screaming and he was terrified. He wanted nothing more than to go back to his home, and hugged Mrs. Perez.

Then he heard the crying of one of the youngest kids. He couldn’t remembered how, but suddenly his body was covering the body of one the kids.

“It’s okay, Ro, it’s okay.” The little boy was crying, and babbling something about how it wasn’t Rem fault either, who was a few steps aways holding back tears.

Janus sent the boys upstairs, and only then he realized he was alone with the adult of the house.

“You shouldn’t tell me how to raise these kids.” He slurred, clearly drunk.

Janus pretended he wasn’t scared, but fuck his legs were shaking and he was so sure his voice was trembling too, “And you shouldn’t be a jerk, and yet…”

There was a fight in the house.

There was a fight in the house, specifically in the kitchen.

There was a fight in the house, in the kitchen and for some stupid reason there was a pot with boiling water.

Janus only remembered how it was _hothothothot_ and his scream.

He didn’t remember anything else.

* * *

He woke up in a white room, he guessed it was the hospital, thank god. Slowly, he became aware of his surroundings, and only then he heard the Spanish chanting padre mío, por favor, cuídelo.

“Mom?”

Janus didn’t was wrapped in a hug, and he knew who she was.

“I am so sorry, mom…”

“It wasn’t your fault…”

* * *

His social worker was ashamed, to say the least, so he put on a good word for Mrs. Perez, and soon the adoption paperwork came. 

They had a small dinner that night, to celebrate the adoption. Remus and Roman came to visit, and while Janus’ half face was still wrapped in bandages, and he still felt dizzy from time to time, he was happy. Really happy. 

* * *

“Do you think they hate me?” He asked, as his mom (his mom!) cleaned the injury with her soft hands.

“Who?”

“My soulmate, half of my face is now…”

“Hey, no. Don’t do that to yourself, Janus.”

Janus didn’t ask, he tried to believe his mom’s, but he still wondered.

* * *

It was a normal day, for Patton, he brushed his teeth and stared into the mirror. He kissed three fingers and put them against the tattoos covering his face.

“I’ll meet you soon, love.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took longer, and i can only blame my depressed ass

When Patton left for college, his moms were already on the process of adopting other kids. Truth to be told, a part of him was extremely jealous, but most of all he was happy and excited for his mamas.

He was used to visit each weekend, but the day the kids were dropped he decided against it, he didn’t want to overwhelm them. His mom sent a photo of the little kids, who were practically identical twins except that one had a small white-streak hair and the other was shorter.

Patton was cooking, waiting for his roommate to come back when his mind drifted back into his soulmate. It has been three years without any new tattoo on Patton skin, and while he was relieved that whatever life his soulmate was living was over, he wondered why it stopped.

He himself got more scars ever since he started college a few months ago, a burnt on his index finger when he tried to cook some ramen, another on his shoulder when Virgil accidentally stabbed him _(his mind went to the exact moment of Virgil’s panicked face when he realized what he just did, and he snorted)_ and several bruises that disappeared over the days.

Absentmindedly he touched the tattoos on his face, only to stop when the burning smell got into his nostrils.

“Oh shit!”

When Virgil arrived, there pizzas on the table, the burning smelled was almost unpredictable, and all the windows were open.

“Is everything okay?” He cautiously said, sitting next to his friend who has staring into his computer.

“Yeah sure!”

“A fake one or a truthful sure?”

Patton sighed, dropping the façade, “I don’t know, to be honest.”

“That’s fair.”

He sat next to him, and in silence they ate.

* * *

Sometimes, for Janus it was hard to imagine how much his life has change. He felt his mom caressing his hair as a dish with picadillo was placed in front of him.

“Who are you talking to?” His mom asked, and Janus had the phone on his hand, but he wasn’t really paying attention to it.

“Roman.” He lied, kind of, at least. He was really talking with the kid before his mind drifted into somewhere. Janus felt the ghost of a touch on his scar and he wondered if it was normal pain or if his soulmate was touching his tattoo.

He had become a self-taught kind of an expert on soulbounds, and many researches and experiments had confirmed that sometimes if the soulbound was really strong the soulmates could feel the touched on the tattoo.

“You’re drifting again.” He heard his mama said, breaking his thoughts. He gave a small smile, and his mom was smiling too, “I said that those kids have been through a lot.”

Janus nodded, “Maybe this is their last house.”

“God, I hope so.”

After the accident, or _The Tragic Night_ as the twins call it, the three have become very close, texting each other pretty much daily and if the foster home allowed it, Janus would go to their houses and play. It was almost like having little gremlins-like-brothers, and Jan loved them very much.

He heard the way his mom chuckled softly, “What?”

“Nothing, you’re just spacing out a lot, are you okay, mijo?”

Janus smiled, softly, feeling goosebumps on his marred cheek, “Do you think they hate me?”

Her mom smiled, “If they do, then they’re not good soulmates.”

Janus smiled softly, “You only say that cuz I’m your son.” He joked, even though a part of him really believed that.

His mom smacked his head, not harsh like other people had done, but softly as an inside joke between them, “Shush it.”

Yes, sometimes, for Janus it was hard to imagine how much his life has change, because even with all his insecurities, he was finally safe and happy.

So, so happy.

* * *

Patton was smiling, sitting in a bench near the jury a few minutes before the trial started. Today, after fostering his brother Roman and Remus for nine months they were going to get officially adopted. Both kids were very excited, Roman wearing a red bowtie and Remus was wearing a green tie, or at least he used to be wearing one. Patton wasn’t very sure where the piece of clothing had ended up.

The kids were practically vibrating, after all they were almost nine years in the system. Patton didn’t remember a lot of his time on the system, since his moms adopted him when he was only a year old.

“How are you feeling, brother?” The tiny voice of Remus broke his thoughts, as he sat next to him.

Patton find amazing how the twins ended up being such a huge part of his life even if he didn’t live with them anymore. The first time he visited his moms and the twins were there, Remus was excited to meet the other _kid_ while Roman was shyer. Now, both had ended up being almost inseparable.

“I’m good, Rem, how about you? Excited?”

Remus nodded, moving his legs up and down, “Jan said he’s coming to the trial, and I’m excited about that too, we haven’t seen him in almost a year.” He admitted, and Patton nodded.

_The Tragic Night,_ Patton was familiar with that event in the life of the twins and was horrified when he first heard it. Roman to this day, was slightly scared of fire and anxious inside a kitchen.

“Is he now?” He continued. He’d heard of Janus, several times, and was excited to meet him.

“We invited him, he better come.” Remus mumbled.

* * *

“Are you sure it’s okay, mom?” Janus asked for what it felt the thousandth time in the car ride, “I don’t want to disrupt their moment.”

His mom smiled, and shook her head, “Don’t be silly, the twins will be excited to see you again!”

He grumbled but decided to say nothing more. They were getting closer to the direction, and Janus got his phone to send them a message, he couldn’t go into the trial, but he would wait outside and probably join their celebration, that’s it if Roman’s and Remus’ parents were okay with it.

He unconsciously rubbed his cheek, only to has his hand swept by his mom, “Don’t be nervous, sweetie.”

They arrived at the place, and his mom said the basic thing: _if you need me to pick you up tell me, if you pick a taxi tell me, text me if something…_ Janus simply nodded and waved goodbye.

* * *

The whole trial Patton was either crying, taking photos of the twins and/or texting Virgil sending the images and several _!!!!!!_.

When it was over, Patton was too busy sending his best friend a text message to notice that someone was staring at him, specifically at his tattoos.

_Are you coming to celebrate? The kids want burgers_

“Jan-Jan!” He heard Roman screamed and saw the way he run and throw himself at guy.

A guy who has the same shape of his tattoo on his face.

**_“I found you.”_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah, remember when i said about this being only two chapter-long? welp

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me at my tumblr @yuna-dan


End file.
